Have you ever kissed someone and they didn’t kiss you back?
Have you ever said “I love you,” only to be answered by a awkward, uncomfortable, sucking silence?
I have, and it was called: “Executive Leadership Program Developmental Assignment with the National Marine Fisheries Service.”
As a requirement of my participation in the USDA Executive Leadership Program I am required to complete a 60 day “Developmental Assignment.”
“An ELP developmental assignment is a special work experience where the participant has the opportunity to practice skills and learning’s in a new and different work environment.”
I saw this requirement as a real opportunity to ask some questions and maybe learn something new. Many times, I have wondered, did keep my career too narrow? Have I developed enough skills and abilities to work for private industry? Could I have done public service for another Federal Agency? How pigeon-holed am I? How specialized is my experience, and could I function in another work environment? Do I only have one place in the world? Is there only one employer willing to employ me? Is the grass really greener on the other side of the fence?
My ELP developmental assignment was going to be the stuff worth blogging about… and it was, but not quite what I had imagined.
Through a fellow ELP student (and all around good guy), I followed up on an opportunity to work for National Marine Fisheries Service (NMFS), NOAA – Sacramento Area Office. How cool is that! I would be a stand-in Fish Biologist. In my experience, fish are way cool, especially the fish NMFS are responsible for: Chinook salmon, steelhead, green sturgeon, Threatened and Endangered anadromous fish. Anadromous fish hatch upstream, swim downstream to the ocean, hang out in the ocean and eat, then swim upstream to spawn and die. At a minimum I would learn how to say, and spell “anadromous.”
Then it got even cooler – I was to review current water storage options (a.k.a new dams) being considered in the state of California and provide that information to other NOAA staff, and also review current academic, State and Federal perspectives on climate change. Also, my assignment was to review NOAA’s National Marine Fisheries Service (NMFS) policy, regulations and procedures that may be concerned with the water storage options and issues.
All of the above were to be shared and discussed with the staff to get their perspective and opinions to formulate the Agency’s issues and concerns, or formulate an Agency position concerning the potential development of additional water storage in California.
Unfortunately, things turned from cool to cold, to frigid, then glacial.

The Sacramento sucker is not an andronomous fish.
My first lesson was in the value of face time. Everyone was AOK with a virtual assignment where I would meet with staff in Sacramento, return to write and do research at my desk, then return to Sacramento. Sort of like those migrating fish… Twice, I went to the Sacramento office and found no one, and I mean no one, there during regular business hours. I will not work another virtual job. I need to see who I am working with.
My second lesson was in making appointments. I re-learned the value of making appointments and keeping them. But, I didn’t make enough appointments. I needed to schedule out the whole 60 days in advance, because I soon found that I could end up waiting weeks before someone was available. Lots of appointments are needed to work with with NOAA/NMFS staff.
The next lesson is hard to describe, maybe because I didn’t learn how to deal with it. What do you do when you need substance and all you get is… nothing? I sent draft documents for review and people either read them and had no comment, or made editorial scratch marks. Maybe I didn’t understand just how independent I was supposed to be? So I stepped it up, sent out more drafts and started making phone calls. I became worried when people in the office wouldn’t make eye contact with me. Maybe “Have you read it yet?” was now tattooed on my forehead? Maybe I was now coming on too strong? I asked four people for help finding a Biological Opinion for green sturgeon and each referred me to someone else, and the last person wasn’t in the office. I eventually found two very nice BO’s for sturgeon on their server using the Microsoft search document function. You can do a lot with Google and Microsoft as your only friends.
I was warned in advance, “Be careful, they’re a bunch of overworked introverts,” my mentor told me. I’m used to overworked staff, and I’m used to introverts, but not like this!
Yesterday, I finished. Actually, I stopped. After getting up at 0500, and driving three hours to Sacramento, I went to pick up any comments, take a photograph of the staff, and incorporate any remaining comments, but there was nothing on my desk. There were no messages. My supervisor was gone, and there was nothing for me to do. After three weeks of asking for comments on my draft document, not one comment, not one response. The cool project was moving slower than a glacier before global warming! I decided I was done; so done, I didn’t even want to take their photo. I departed the office leaving my binder of materials and my NOAA badge in my supervisor’s office.
Can you tell that I’m a bit bitter? Yes, but despite circumstances, I still think it was one of the coolest projects I have been allowed to work on, and I learned a very big lesson.
Several times over the last three weeks, I looked down, hoping to see my ruby red slippers. “There’s no place like home. There’s no place like home,” and I would click my heels three times.
This Developmental Assignment has reminded me about the value of long-term relationships and the value of finding a niche, of knowing your home. This March, my husband and I will be celebrating our 25th wedding anniversary. There is a reason why we are still married after 25 years. When I kiss him, we kiss together. When I say “I love you,” he says “I love you, too.” Long-term relationships are long-term because they are the result of a good decision about the right fit.
This April, I will have 28 years working for the Forest Service and I’m looking forward. I had a opportunity to jump the fence and see just how green is that grass on the other side? I’m glad that while jumping that fence I tripped, and my jeans ripped on a nail, and I got a bloody nose. I had an opportunity to look at another corporate culture, another work environment, another part of the world, and some one else’s job. I know why I work for the Forest Service, because it is a good decision and the right fit for both of us.
Indeed, I know why the Chinook salmon swim up stream!
Now, that’s cool.